Donald has seemed scared to fire anyone in his cabinet…until now, Kristi Noem is out as DHS Secretary. But, she won’t be completely out, Donald has named her Shield of the Americas. A new title that in Donald’s world translates to: I love you Kristi but, I’m the Queen of this Quagmire, under the bus you go!
Donald and Kristi have much in common, they both act above the law, they both love plush private planes, they both hate dogs, they both wear the same shade of foundation, they both are not qualified for their jobs, and they both think being American is being white. Alas, with all this in common, Donald fired Kristi.
“Noem will be remembered for treating Americans like she treats her dogs.” Miles Teller
Who is replacing Kristi? Well, after an exhaustive search in the GOP swamp for another loyal minion, Donald picked Oklahoma Republican senator, Markwayne Mullin. He is sure to be on his best behavior during his senate confirmation hearings, although judging by past confirmation hearings, he could scream, cry, chug a beer, and still get confirmed.
As far as we know, Markwayne never shot a puppy in the face. However, Markwayne loves him some Donald, so expect to see more ICE attacks on American citizens and record setting ass kissing to please his Dear Leader Donald.
Word on the street is, Markwayne will serve double duty as an official White House cage fighter and DHS Secretary.
Here we are folks, Markwayne will run the Department of Homeland Security.
Donald’s DHS policies will remain…only the face on Donald’s DHS is changing.
Jebus help us, ‘cause we’re gonna need it.